500+ Funny Facebook Status Ideas And Messages

If you’re looking for a good laugh, you’ve come to the right place! In this blog post, we will be sharing over 500 funny Facebook status ideas and messages.

Whether you’re looking for something to post on your own profile or want to send a funny message to a friend, we’ve got you covered. So sit back, relax, and enjoy some of the funniest Facebook statuses out there!

Funny Facebook Status

  1. I’m not saying that I don’t like my life, but sometimes I wish that things were just a little bit different.
  2. I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.
  3. If you’re happy and you know it, post this as your status.
  4. If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it.
  5. I’m not online, it’s just an optical illusion.
  6. I’m sorry for what I have not done.
  7. I’m the kind of person who will burst out laughing in dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
  8. I’m not single, I’m just romantically challenged.
  9. I’m not antisocial, I’m just selectively social.
  10. If you’re talking to me and you think I’m ignoring you, chances are I am.
  11. I’m not short, I’m a fun size!
  12. I’m not a control freak, I’m a perfectionist.
  13. Hey, it’s me! The person you’re talking to on Facebook right now!
  14. If you can’t convince them, confuse them.
  15. I’m the kind of person who will walk into a spider web and think it was thrown at me.
  16. I’m not always right, but I’m never in doubt.
  17. Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
  18. I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!
  19. I’m not an early bird or a night owl, I’m some form of the sick vampire bat.
  20. I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.
  21. I’m not rude, I’m honest. It’s not my fault that the truth hurts.
  22. You’re not yourself today. I liked you better yesterday.
  23. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just forget me.
  24. I’m the reason God created the middle finger.
  25. I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
  26. I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.
  27. If you can read this, then I can slam on my brakes and sue you!
  28. I’m not a Hypocrite, I live what I believe, and I believe what I live.
  29. I’m so poor that when I heard about free food, I went out looking for it.
  30. I’m so old that when people ask me my age, I tell them to subtract ten years and that’s my IQ.
  31. I’m so old that when I trick-or-treat, the kids give me candy!
  32. I’m so old that I can remember when all this was trees… and bushes…
  33. I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.
  34. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just forget me.
  35. I’m the reason God created the middle finger.
  36. I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
  37. I’m so old that when people ask me my age, I tell them to subtract ten years and that’s my IQ.
  38. I’m so poor that when I heard about free food, I went out looking for it.
  39. I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.
  40. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just forget me.
  41. I’m the reason God created the middle finger.
  42. I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
  43. I’m so old that when I trick-or-treat, the kids give me candy!
  44. I’m so old that I can remember when all this was trees… and bushes…
  45. I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.
  46. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just forget me.
  47. I’m the reason God created the middle finger.
  48. I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
  49. I’m so poor that when I heard about free food, I went out looking for it.
  50. I’m so old that when people ask me my age, I tell them to subtract ten years and that’s my IQ.
  51. I’m so old that when I trick-or-treat, the kids give me candy!
  52. I’m so old that I can remember when all this was trees… and bushes…
  53. Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
  54. If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it.
  55. I’m not online, it’s just an optical illusion.
  56. I’m the kind of person who will burst out laughing in dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
  57. I’m not single, I’m just romantically challenged.
  58. If you’re talking to me and you think I’m ignoring you, chances are I am.
  59. I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!
  60. I’m the kind of person who will walk into a spider web and think it was thrown at me.
  61. You’re not yourself today. I liked you better yesterday.
  62. Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
  63. I’m the reason God created the middle finger.
  64. If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it.
  65. I’m so old that when people ask me my age, I tell them to subtract ten years and that’s my IQ.
  66. I’m so old that when I trick-or-treat, the kids give me candy!
  67. I’m so old that I can remember when all this was trees… and bushes…
  68. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just forget me.
  69. I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.
  70. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just forget me.
  71. I’m so old that when people ask me my age, I tell them to subtract ten years and that’s my IQ.
  72. I’m so old that when I trick-or-treat, the kids give me candy!
  73. I’m so old that I can remember when all this was trees… and bushes…
  74. Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
  75. If you want something done, ask a busy person to do.
  76. I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.
  77. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just forget me.
  78. I’m the reason God created the middle finger.
  79. If you’re talking to me and you think I’m ignoring you, chances are I am.
  80. You’re not yourself today. I liked you better yesterday.
  81. Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
  82. If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it.
  83. I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!
  84. If you’re talking to me and you think I’m ignoring you, chances are I am.
  85. You’re not yourself today. I liked you better yesterday.
  86. I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!
  87. I’m so old that when people ask me my age, I tell them to subtract ten years and that’s my IQ.
  88. I’m so old that when I trick-or-treat, the kids give me candy!
  89. I’m so old that I can remember when all this was trees… and bushes…
  90. I’m the reason God created the middle finger.
  91. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just forget me.
  92. Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
  93. If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it.
  94. I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!
  95. I’m the kind of person who will walk into a spider web and think it was thrown at me.
  96. I’m so old that when people ask me my age, I tell them to subtract ten years and that’s my IQ.
  97. If you don’t like me, don’t hate me, just remember me.
  98. I’m the reason God created the middle finger.
  99. If you’re talking to me and you think I’m ignoring you, chances are I am.
  100. You’re not yourself today. I liked you better yesterday.

Funny Facebook Status That Get Comments

  1. Claim yes, take risks, and live life by yourself terms.
  2. Be the part of the change that you want to see in the world.
  3. I’m the kind of person who will walk into a spider web and think it was thrown at me.
  4. Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I am dumb.
  5. If you want something done, I get it.
  6. In order to enjoy ourselves we need money and for money, you need to work not me.
  7. I am the bitch and the boss.
  8. The universe consists of protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons.
  9. Where are the snakes and bitches, I am waiting.
  10. Lost in a gaming zone.
  11. If you want to come on the 2nd, follow me!
  12. Oh, you’re popular on Facebook? That’s trendy.
  13. I’m the individual your mommy cautioned you around.
  14. Nothing more than my peace.
  15. My opinions might have transformed but not the reality that I am always right!
  16. I am right what’s on left.
  17. Life in a bitch den.
  18. Facebook needs an “I don’t care” button.
  19. Chilling and giggling.
  20. Life is much better when you are not around.
  21. Jan, Feb, and cab.
  22. I don’t know why I am not stupid or I am.
  23. Just living for the good food.
  24. What are you waiting for, follow me.
  25. When you inform me, “I can not,” all I listen to is blah blah.
  26. If you are not hilarious just simply don’t follow me.
  27. You should quit kidding yourself.
  28. Life is serious shit.
  29. I am the moon.
  30. Where are the stars?
  31. If you want to be ruled, marry.
  32. I am not as stupid as you.
  33. Be young, be dope, be pleased.
  34. Hey! Are you satisfied?
  35. Life is much better when you’re giggling.
  36. I know I’m lucky that I’m so charming.
  37. Another great quote ruined my day.
  38. Twinkle, Twinkle no little star.
  39. Boom there is nothing to laugh at.
  40. Be happy, it drives people crazy.
  41. Jobless forever and I don’t want it.
  42. I birthed complimentarily! Now I’m pricey.
  43. If you have eyes, take a look at me now!
  44. Ride a cowboy.
  45. I was not lucky I just earned it.
  46. Believe in yourself and do nothing.
  47. I am the easiest person on the planet.
  48. Action is a key to success.
  49. He is my king but I am not his queen.
  50. We fit like duplicate, as well as pest.

Funny Facebook Status Ideas

Here are some hilarious status ideas that will make your Facebook page pop with humor! 

You won’t be able to resist the laughter when you share these posts.

  1. The essential point is to enjoy your life– to be pleased– nothing else is the issue.
  2. Nothing lasts, yet difficult people do.
  3. Laziness is the key to all success.
  4. She was ever attempted. No matter. Try Again. Fail once more. Fail better.
  5. The fantastic enjoyment in life is doing nothing.
  6. An excellent plan today is far better than the best plan tomorrow.
  7. The day is what you make it!
  8. He who has a why to live can birth virtually any kind of just how.
  9. Do what you cannot and enjoy.
  10. I am stunning you just don’t know.
  11. If you don’t know the roadway you’re walking, start walking backward.
  12. I haven’t failed at anything. I’ve discovered all the upside-down of doing it!
  13. It does not matter how slow you are as long as you are not doomed.
  14. Huge tasks usually go to the guys who show their capability to outgrow small ones. Love Captions for Facebook.
  15. When I think about how lucky we are to have him in our lives, words seem insufficient.
  16. When I am with you, I feel secure from the things that injure me inside.
  17. Whenever I look at the keyboard, U and I are always together.
  18. I miss you each day.
  19. I desire a partnership like “Tom & Jerry” fight daily.
  20. I like you– those three words have my life in them.
  21. I am the reason you laugh.
  22. A lady never gets old. So, am I.
  23. Love life, as well as life, discovers an attractive way to like you back.
  24. I recognize there is no one I like.
  25. A person understands he’s in love when he dislikes his vehicle for a couple of days.
  26. Life is ever time fun.
  27. Gotta go insane.
  28. For those singles out there, stop searching for love or you will just end up getting married.
  29. Never ask for a man.
  30. To all the young graduates’ Cheers!
  31. Even when I don’t need money, I need money.
  32. Cola would put cocaine back in their recipe if they really cared about the issue of obesity.
  33. Sigh. I don’t have superpowers.
  34. Can I sleep 24/7? K. I already am.
  35. Each time I feel like running away, I just recall I hate running.
  36. Caring about what others think is something I never do.
  37. Am I embarrassing? Yes, no doubt.
  38. Life is a biscuit in a cup of tea.
  39. When my bank flags deposits as a suspicious activity I already know I am broke.
  40. I don’t like to follow. I like to lead.
  41. When people ask me what I’m doing this weekend, I just stare at them and say “Nothing”.
  42. I think that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And then find someone whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
  43. I always like to stay positive and happy because it drives people crazy.
  44. I am homeless in my space.
  45. No one listens to me.
  46. The trouble with being awesome is that opposites attract..
  47. So, I attract a lot of idiots.
  48. I’m on power-saving mode.
  49. I am awesome. And you? You are not.
  50. I am single because God is busy writing the best love story for me.
  51. I don’t really believe in luck.
  52. I think that if you work hard and are kind, good things will happen to you.
  53. I am a firm believer in the saying ” treat others as you would want to be treated.” So, treat me well.
  54. I’m not lazy, I’m on power-saving mode.
  55. I am awesome. And you? You are not.
  56. I am single because God is busy writing the best love story for me.
  57. No one listens to me.
  58. The best lesson learnt “Never argue with a genius.”
  59. I think that if you work hard and are kind, good things will happen to you.
  60. You can’t keep up with me.
  61. I’m on power-saving mode so please do not disturb.
  62. Marriage is similar to jumping into hell.
  63. All the questions are answered by google so what to worry about?
  64. Hello 911? Please take her, she has stolen my heart.
  65. You know what: I am just 18 years old with 40 years of experience.

Funny Hacked Facebook Status

  1. I think that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And then find someone.
  2. Whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
  3. I always like to stay positive and happy because it drives people crazy.
  4. I am homeless in my space.
  5. Caring about what others think is something I never do.
  6. Each time I feel like running away, I just recall.
  7. I hate running.
  8. When my bank flags deposits as a suspicious activity.
  9. I already know I am broke.
  10. Sigh. I don’t have superpowers.
  11. Can I sleep 24/seven? K, I already am.
  12. Cola would put cocaine back in their recipe.
  13. If they really cared about the issue of obesity.
  14. For those singles out there, stop searching for love.
  15. Or you will just end up getting married.
  16. Gotta go insane!
  17. Life is ever time fun!
  18. In love when he dislikes his vehicle for a couple of days.
  19. And says he is going to change it, but never does.
  20. Funny how we can go weeks without talking to someone.
  21. And then suddenly, we can’t go a day without them.
  22. I’m on power-saving mode.”
  23. I am awesome. And you? You are not.
  24. I am single because God is busy writing the best love story for me.”
  25. No one listens to me. The trouble with being awesome is that opposites attract.. So, I attract a lot of idiots.
  26. I don’t really believe in luck. I think that if you work hard and are kind, good things will happen to you.
  27. Love life and hate life.
  28. I am a firm believer in the saying “treat others as you would want to be treated.” So, treat me well.
  29. Do you know that laughter is the best medicine?
  30. Live like an idiot.

The “I’m So Bored” Funny Facebook Status

Do you know that laughter is the best medicine? It’s true! Laughter has been shown to improve your mood, increase your lifespan, and even boost your immune system. So, why not add some humor to your day with a funny Facebook status?

Following are some best funny Facebook statuses:

  1. I’m so bored that I could scream.
  2. I’m so bored that I might actually die of boredom.
  3. Boredom is a disease and I am its cure.
  4. If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space.
  5. Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.

The “I’m In A Bad Mood” Funny Facebook Status

  1. I’m in a bad mood. Do not disturb.
  2. I’m in a bad mood. Please do not disturb.
  3. I’m in a bad mood. Leave me alone.
  4. I’m in a bad mood. I don’t want to talk to anyone.
  5. I’m in a bad mood and I don’t know why.
  6. I’m in a bad mood and I don’t care who knows it.
  7. I’m in a bad mood and there’s nothing you can do about it.
  8. I’m having a bad day. Please do not disturb.
  9. Today is not my day. Please do not disturb.
  10. This is why I’m single: because I’m in a relationship with my bed and Netflix.
  11. I’m not in a bad mood, I’m just naturally mean.
  12. I’m not in a bad mood, I just don’t like you.
  13. I’m not in a bad mood, I just don’t like people.
  14. I’m not in a bad mood, I’m just tired of everyone.
  15. I’m not in a bad mood, I’m just tired of life.

The “I’m Just Joking Around” Funny Facebook Status

  1. I’m just joking around. Don’t take me too seriously.
  2. I’m just joking around. I don’t actually mean it.
  3. I’m just kidding. Don’t be so sensitive.
  4. I’m only joking. Lighten up!
  5. Just kidding! I would never actually do that!
  6. Don’t worry, I was just joking.
  7. I’m not actually mad, I was just joking around.
  8. I’m not actually angry, I was just joking.
  9. I’m not really mad at you, I was just joking.
  10. Just because I joked about it doesn’t mean I actually want to do it.
  11. I joked about it because I knew you would never let me do it.
  12. Just because I joked about it doesn’t mean I actually feel that way.
  13. I was just joking around. I don’t actually hate you.
  14. I was just joking around. I don’t actually think you’re a idiot.
  15. I was just kidding when I said I hope you die in a fire. Please don’t actually die.

The “This Is My Real Life” Funny Facebook status

  1. I am not real, I’m a reel.
  2. This is my real life. I’m not just making this stuff up.
  3. This is my real life and it’s not always easy or perfect.
  4. I’m not just making this stuff up, this is my real life.
  5. My life is not a fairytale, it’s reality.
  6. I’m living my life and I’m not going to apologize for it.
  7. This is my life and I’m going to live it the way I want to.
  8. I’m not going to change my life for anyone.
  9. This is who I am and this is my life.
  10. I’m not going to pretend to be someone I’m not.
  11. I’m not going to pretend to be something I’m not.
  12. I’m not going to live my life for anyone but myself.
  13. I’m not going to change who I am for anyone.
  14. This is my life and I’m going to live it the way I want to. Thanks for being a part of it!
  15. The “I’m just being honest” , its crazy!
  16. I’m just being honest. If you can’t handle the truth, then you can’t handle me.
  17. I’m just being honest. I don’t sugarcoat anything.
  18. I’m just keeping it real. I don’t sugarcoat anything.
  19. If you can’t work stay quiet.
  20. I hope you found these funny, I worked really hard 🙂

##The “life is too short to care about _____” funny Facebook status

  1. Life is too short to care about what other people think.
  2. Life is too short to care about what other people say.
  3. Life is too short to care about what other people do.
  4. Life is too short to care about what other people have.
  5. Life is too short to care about who you are or who you aren’t.
  6. Life is too short to care about what you have or what you don’t have.
  7. Life is too short to care about where you are or where you aren’t.
  8. Life is too short to care about what you’re doing or what you’re not doing.
  9. Life is too short to care about your past or your future.
  10. Life is too short to care about what could have been or what might be.
  11. Life is too short to care about anything that doesn’t make you happy.
  12. I’m just being me. If you don’t like it, you can leave.
  13. I’m just being myself. If you don’t like it, you can leave.
  14. I’m just being honest. If you can’t handle the truth, then you can’t handle me.
  15. I’m just being real. If you can’t handle the truth, then you can’t handle me.
  16. I’m just living my life. If you don’t like it, you can leave.
  17. I’m just doing me. If you don’t like it, you can leave.
  18. I’m not going to change who I am for anyone. If you don’t like it, you can leave.
  19. This is my life and I’m going to live it the way I want to. Thanks for being a part of it!
  20. I’m just being honest. I don’t sugarcoat anything.

The “I’m over it” Funny Facebook Status

  1. I’m over it. I’m done. I give up.
  2. I’m over it. I quit.
  3. I’m over it. This is the end.
  4. I’m over it. Goodbye forever.
  5. I’m over it and I’m never going back!
  6. This is the end of the line. I’m done.
  7. I’m done with this. I’m moving on.
  8. I’m done with this and I’m never looking back!
  9. I’m over it and I’m never going to think about it again!
  10. I’ve had enough of this. I’m done.
  11. I don’t care anymore. I’m over it.
  12. This is the end of the line. I’m done with this.
  13. I’m done with this and I’m never going to look back!
  14. I’m over it and I’m never going to think about it again! Thanks for being a part of it!
  15. This is my life. This is who I am.
  16. This is my life and I’m not going to change it for anyone.
  17. This is my life and I’m going to live it the way I want to.
  18. I’m not going to change who I am for anyone. This is my life.
  19. This is my life and I’m not going to apologize for it.
  20. I’m not going to change my life for anyone. This is who I am.
  21. I’m not going to pretend to be someone I’m not. This is my life.
  22. This is my life and I’m going to live it the way I want to. Thanks for being a part of it!

The Cheesy Funny Facebook Status

  1. I’m so cheesy, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  2. I’m so corny, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  3. I’m so lame, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  4. But I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  5. I’m so sappy, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  6. I know this is cheesy, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  7. I know this is corny, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  8. I know this is lame, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  9. Thanks for being a part of my life! I love you all!
  10. This might be cheesy, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  11. Thanks for being a part of my life! You’re all amazing!
  12. I’m grateful for each and every one of you. Thanks for being a part of my life!
  13. You all mean so much to me. I love you all! Thanks for being a part of my life!
  14. I’m not single, I’m just socially awkward and bad at flirting.
  15. I’m not single, I’m just really picky and no one has met my standards yet.
  16. I’m not single, I’m just busy being awesome. 😉
  17. I’m not single, I’m taken by the best boyfriend/girlfriend in the world. 🙂
  18. I might be single, but that doesn’t mean I’m not amazing. 😉
  19. I might be single, but that doesn’t mean I’m not awesome. 😉
  20. I might be single, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have love in my life. 🙂
  21. Thanks for being a part of my life! I love you all!
  22. This might be cheesy, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  23. Thanks for being a part of my life! You’re all amazing!
  24. I’m grateful for each and every one of you. Thanks for being a part of my life!
  25. You all mean so much to me. I love you all! Thanks for being a part of my life!
  26. I’m not single, I’m just socially awkward and bad at flirting.
  27. I’m not single, I’m just really picky and no one has met my standards yet.
  28. I’m not single, I’m just busy being awesome. 😉
  29. I might be single, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have love in my life. 🙂
  30. I’m grateful for each and every one of you. Thanks for being a part of my life!
  31. You all mean so much to me. I love you all! Thanks for being a part of my life!

The over-the-top Funny Facebook status

  1. I’m so over-the-top, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  2. I’m so extra, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  3. I’m so dramatic, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  4. But I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  5. I know this is over-the-top, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  6. I know this is extra, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  7. I know this is dramatic, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂

The Cryptic Funny Facebook Status

  1. I’m so cryptic, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  2. I’m so confusing, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  3. I’m so mysterious, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  4. But I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  5. I know this is cryptic, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  6. I know this is confusing, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  7. I know this is mysterious, but I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  8. The shortest are the sweetest.
  9. I’m so short, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  10. I’m so sweet, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  11. But I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  12. Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.
  13. In a boys brain everything is on left. In
  14. In girls brain everything is on its right place.
  15. I’m so worried, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  16. But I just wanted to let you all know that I am not an idiot. 🙂
  17. Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive.
  18. I’m so serious that I am not serious at all.
  19. My parents have the coolest kid ever.
  20. I’m so cool that I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  21. I just wanted to let you all know that I am the coolest kid ever. 🙂
  22. I’m not single, I’m just really picky and no one has met my standards yet.

The Witty And Funny Facebook Status

  1. I’m so witty, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  2. I’m so funny, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  3. But I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  4. Life is too short to waste time on things that don’t matter.
  5. I’m so short, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  6. Single is not lonely.
  7. Life is always behaving like a rat.
  8. Who needs drama when you have me.
  9. Good girls are the never exposed bad girls.
  10. Find the truth I dare you.
  11. Don’t like me I am not your Facebook status.
  12. Don’t comment.
  13. Always do left cuz nothing is right.
  14. Facebook is food.
  15. 10 out of 10 is nothing.
  16. Class means never be on time.
  17. Life is short go quick.
  18. I’m not single, I’m just really picky and no one has met my standards yet.
  19. I’m not single, I’m just busy being awesome. 😉
  20. I might be single, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have love in my life. 🙂
  21. My password is “incorrect”.
  22. I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.
  23. I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.
  24. I’m not procrastinating, I’m just enjoying my last few moments of not doing anything.
  25. My life is like an open book. But it’s not very interesting so please don’t read it.
  26. I’m not single, I’m just really picky and no one has met my standards yet.
  27. I’m not sure what my password is but it’s definitely not “password”.
  28. I’m sorry for what I said when I was hungry.
  29. I’m the kind of person who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
  30. I’m not lazy, I’m just on my energy saving mode.
  31. Ok, I give up. What’s your password?
  32. Please don’t tell me to smile.
  33. I’m not sure what my password is but it’s definitely not “password”.
  34. I’m the kind of person who will burst out laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
  35. That awkward moment when you realize that you’ve been using “your” instead of “you’re” for the past year.
  36. Ok, I give up. What’s your password.
  37. That awkward moment when your password is the name of your crush and your crush is asking for it.
  38. If you cannot find the key search for lock.
  39. Don’t beat kids please they play PUBG nowadays.
  40. I’m not fat, I’m just easy to see.
  41. My password is “incorrect”.
  42. I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.
  43. I’m not lazy, I’m on non-energy saving mode.
  44. I might be single, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have love in my life.
  45. Life is so boring without phone.
  46. This is me every time I see a cute dog meme.
  47. I’m not single, I’m just really picky and no one has met my standards yet.
  48. But I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. 🙂
  49. I’m so funny, I’m not even sure if this is funny or not.
  50. I’m sorry for what I said when I was hungry.
  51. That awkward moment when you realize that you’ve been using “your” instead of “you’re” for the past year
  52. Please don’t tell me to talk.
  53. I hate you but don’t hate me.
  54. Do no get fit.
  55. Fit is fat as I can’t say no to food.
  56. If you say no to food you are stupid.
  57. I love food so much that I might as well marry it. 😉
  58. I’m not fat, I’m just easy to see.
  59. I’m sorry for what I said when I was hungry.
  60. Food is my life. 🙂
  61. I love food more than I love people.
  62. I’m not fat, I’m full with food.
  63. I know I am funny no need to tell me.
  64. I can just make everyone laugh.
  65. Humor is a God’s gift for mankind.
  66. Rule 1 I am right, but if I am wrong, read rule 1.
  67. If you can’t make fun of yourself, then who can you make fun of?
  68. I’m sorry for what I said because I am funny.
  69. I am not idiot alone.
  70. I’m funny because I’m happy. 🙂
  71. Funny is my middle name. 😉
  72. My sense of humor is like a dry martini. Straight up, with a twist!
  73. I’m not single, I’m just really picky and no one has met my standards yet.
  74. Life is a bitch. So I am.
  75. The only exercise I do is running out of money.
  76. The magnet attracts. This means I am a magnet.
  77. My laptop screen is brighter than my future.
  78. Get ready to laugh and follow me.
  79. 100 problems 1 solution: a good joke.
  80. Life gives you lemon, you ask for oranges.
  81. I am not on Facebook. So, I don’t have a funny status.
  82. The world is great. Until you wake up.
  83. Your attitude can hurt me; mine may even kill you..
  84. I’m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know that I’m not dumb… I also know that I’m not blonde.
  85. I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
  86. I’m so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed!
  87. I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect!
  88. I’m not a complete idiot — some parts are missing.
  89. You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
  90. I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
  91. I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure.
  92. If we are what we eat, then I’m fast, cheap and easy.
  93. I’m not normally a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me Superman!
  94. I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
  95. My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.
  96. I am so old, I can remember when the Dead Sea was only sick.
  97. I’m not as dumb as you look.
  98. I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!
  99. I’m not a complete idiot — some parts are missing.
  100. You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

If you’re looking for a good laugh, here are over 500 funny Facebook status ideas and messages that you can use. From clever wit to silly jokes, there’s something here for everyone. So go ahead and post away!

These super funny quotes for Facebook status will have people rolling on the floor, especially if they’re Statuses! Whether you want to reveal personal details or just share a little laughter with friends – these are perfect.

This is all about the funny Facebook statuses. If you have any more, please share them in the comments below! And don’t forget to like and share this post! Thanks for reading! You can always check out Latest Updates and see what’s going on too-see ya!

Hope you have enjoyed this blog post and selected the best one for your Facebook profile. Happy status-ing 🙂

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